Life Principle #12: Cherish Others

You won’t get far in life without a solid group of friends pushing you to be better and more capable. (You won’t have as much fun either!)

You won’t get far by treating everyone around you like they are beneath you.

And you won’t get far by ignoring everyone that’s not in your group.

A Renaissance Life is a life of cherishing others.

Life Principle: Cherish Others

People want to be seen and heard more than anything in the world. Cherishing others means caring about the well-being and success of the people around you. 

How do you cherish others?

Reach out first. Healthy relationships are nourished by reaching out to those you cherish, in small intentional ways that show you care.

Be Generous. Relationships are a two-way street. You both have to be giving something in order to get something out of the friendship, and Generosity is a great way of doing that. No one in the history of ever has thought generosity is a bad character trait for a friend. Who wants to be surrounded by people who don’t give two shakes of a shake weight about you? Go out of your way to be generous.

Genuinely want them to succeed. Have you ever known someone who supports what you do, yet secret wishes you would fail? Some friend indeed. Don’t be them! Life is abundant, great friendships genuinely desire for each party to succeed in their pursuits. 

Love the mundane. A great relationship is someone you can do absolutely nothing with and still have a great time. Painting a wall? Waiting in line? Walking through an airport? Each can be a laugh out loud moment with the right group.

Be there — especially when I­t­ counts. You have to put yourself first, but cherishing others is being there when it counts. If someone asks you to help them when they are in need — and you can — do it. 

And last but not least. Listen. Cherishing others is about listening to what they say. Listen to their hopes and fears. Listen to their problems, and encourage them to believe in themselves. 

Friendercises 

Q: When was the last time you had a deep, heart to heart conversation with someone?
Call up a friend and talk about your hopes and dreams for the year. Where you want to go, who you want to be. Leave small talk for the birds.

Q: When was the last time you went out and meet new people?
Find a group or event around a topic you love and want to master. Become a strong character in that community.

Q: Who are the people you hang out with the most?
I strongly believe that we are the sum of the people we hang out with the most. Sit down and list out who you spend your time with. Are these the people that will push you higher towards your dreams (and vice versa)? Or are they holding you back? Surround yourself with greatness to become great. Surround yourself with positivity to be more positive. Surround yourself with hope to be hopeful.

In the end, cherishing others might be the best way to cherish yourself.

Stay BOLD, Keep Pursuing,

— Josh Waggoner

https://forms.convertkit.com/317372?v=6

Related Insights

“A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself.” — Jim Morrison

“Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher.” —  Oprah Winfrey

“Friends… they cherish one another’s hopes. They are kind to one another’s dreams.” — Henry David Thoreau

“One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship is to understand and to be understood.” — Lucius Annaeus Seneca

“Stay positive and happy. Work hard and don’t give up hope. Be open to criticism and keep learning. Surround yourself with happy, warm and genuine people.” —  Tena Desae

“If you want to become healthy, you have to surround yourself with a group of people that are getting healthy, and you have to be connected to a community that is doing what you want to do.” — Henry Cloud

Daily Challenges

Pushing your capabilities through practice and ritual.

“When you do something every day, you’re only going to get better at what you are doing.”

Joshua C. Green , Ep. 10 of The Renaissance Life Podcast

Do you want to be an extraordinary writer?
How about an insanely good artist or musician?
A super-connector? An exceptional conversationalist?
Health Shaman? Master Yogi?
All the above? (Me! over here!)

Then it’s time to take on a daily challenge.

Inspired by a couple friends (Josh Green and Travis Knight) who I’ve interviewed recently on The Renaissance Life, I’ve decided to take on a daily writing and blogging challenge. I am going to write and blog every single day for an entire year. This is day 20.

We all have these dreams of greatness and desires to live an extraordinary life, but getting from where we are to where we want to be can be hazy. It’s like we can see the peak of the mountain but the journey up is covered in a cloudy malaise of discomfort. (Like a kid who needs glasses and can’t see the whiteboard in class) Most people have dreams but not everyone has the belief system and is bold enough to step into their discomfort zones and challenge their capabilities.

Your mountain is your own, I can’t tell you precisely how you can get up to the top — 
But I can show you what you what has worked well for others and what I am going to do to climb my own mountains: 

Deliberate practice and daily ritual. 

Deliberate practice meaning we aren’t phoning it in. We’re pushing ourselves to our limit every day, and practicing and trying out new strategies that will make us smarter and more creative at what we do.

And Daily being the key word here.
My daily challenge is writing and blogging, so the amount of time I will spend will depend on the types of blogs I want to put out and how long it takes me to make them happen.

Imagine yourself one year from now after you decided to take on a daily challenge. You put in the time, energy and effort to practice every day. After practicing every day for an ENTIRE year, where do you think you will be?

Much better than you would have been if you didn’t decide to challenge yourself.
This is how time can be our ally. Time — like money — has a compound interest effect. By investing in small daily practices that add over time to something great. Small actions lead to big change.

This isn’t going to be easy — and that’s the point.  Our goal here is to push ourselves to be something more than we thought possible, and to grow our abilities faster by putting in more time than we would normally give if we were practicing ‘whenever’. I’m writing this at 9:50 PM after finishing one job and about to start another job. (I’m crazy) But I’m taking on a daily challenge because I believe it can change my life, because I’ve seen it change the lives of others.

I’ll be talking more in-depth strategies and examples about daily challenges soon.

Action Question (AQ): What daily challenge do you want to do?

Keep Pursuing,

— Josh Waggoner

https://forms.convertkit.com/273691?v=6

Related Wisdom:

“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” — Chinese Proverb

“You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.”Zig Ziglar

“Do not be embarrassed by your failures, learn from them and start again.”Richard Branson

CHALLENGE: Binge Reading Blogs

How did Tony Robbins become the Tony Robbins?
How did Tim Ferriss become the Tim Ferriss?
How did Seth Godin become the Seth Godin?

Lewis became a master of connecting.
Maria became a master by connecting ideas from across time.
Paul became a master of speaking, teaching and emotional intelligence.
Ramit became a master of money and psychology.
Pat became a master of podcasting and business by helping others.

We all have our influences in real life and on paper. Titans of our industries. 
But no one starts at the top. (And if they did they wouldn’t have the values to stay there.)

The question is what strategies and insights can we learn from them and apply to become our own thought leaders. How do we get from 0 to 1?  (H👺ll, how do I get from 0.01 to 1?)

I see writing as a direct window into the soul. Our thought process, fears, strengths, ideas — who we are, etched a period of time. (Even lies give us valuable insights into their psyche.)

That’s why I’ve decided to start binge reading blogs of thought readers I follow and enjoy. To know where they started, and understand how they become who they are today. I don’t want to be Tim Ferriss, or Pat Flynn or whoever, but I want to similar things they have created for lives. I want to be able to learn, create, and connect without being encumbered by if I’ll be able to pay rent next month.

Of course a blog is just a piece of their life, but even a small slice of what it takes to be successful is enough to create radical change in our lives.

And I figure, If I’m going to binge something, might as well make it something that improve my life and makes me a better person. (… …. okay fine fine, I’m still going to binge Stranger Things too. 🙂

Here are 5 ground rules I’m following:

1. I am binge reading at most two blogs at a time. (Two because I want to find connections and correlations between the two influencers) 
2. I will read every relevant post, but if they seem useless to my life I’ll skim them.
3. Any time a blog sparks an idea, be that a writing prompt for Renaissance Life or an idea I can use for my work (at 60Watts, boldsheep, Pass It Down or Paul) I will immediately start working on the idea until completed.
4. If any blog post mentions something I should do (action steps) I will immediately do it before moving on. Whether that’s a challenge, business advice, or anything that resembles increased happiness and wellbeing.
5. Some Influencer don’t JUST have a blog but a podcast, books or other areas of interest. I will binge those as well.

I’m looking for patterns, insights into life and how they become who they are today.

If I am every going to be worthy of the title of a Renaissance Man, I’ve got to learn from the best.

I’m starting with Ryan Holiday and Tim Ferriss.

Here’s a list of people I know I’ll want to read of the top of my head:

Ryan Holiday
James Altucher
Pat Flynn
Ramit Sethi
Brain Pickings
Seth Godin
Hugh Macleod
Tim Ferriss
Chase Jarvis
Lewis Howes
Penelope Trunk
Copyblogger (Brian Clark)
GrowthLab

Feel free to make any suggestions to any influencers you enjoy in the comments below or via email. (I’ll periodically update this list)

I’ll keep you updated on my binge reading journey as I go.

Join me on this CHALLENGE —  if your crazy like me.

Keep Pursuing,

— Josh Waggoner