Tag: How to change your life

Personal Commitments

Whether we realize it or not, every day is a commitment to something.

To family, to specific work, to a lifestyle.

As many have saved, our time is our most important finite resource. And our schedule highlights what we deem important.

That is if we think about it. Often there are things our calendars we do, that given a thought or alternative, we would choose something different.

We want to prioritize friends, but we feel the need to prioritize more work instead. Sometimes because it’s necessary (for food and stability.) But sometimes we prioritize the inessentials because we feel like we don’t have a choice or the day to day stresses of life blind us from taking stock of our lives and whether or not it’s how we want to live.

Taking a break and stepping outside of your normal is a great way to slow down and gain perspective on what you want, what you’re doing, and where you are going.

Deciding to change is the first step to change. This is a personal commitment we make with ourselves.

Personal commitments are:

Commitments usually stem from the heart and align with (at least in clear moments) the mind.

  • Deliberate
  • Catalysts for change and personal development
  • Internal but have a great chance of success with outside help (accountability, incentive, constraints, consequences)

What makes you fall in love with the person you fall in love with? So many deep things that words can’t quite describe. But staying in love is a daily act.

Commitments can come from both positive and negative circumstances and feedback. They usually begin from a place of calm and stillness (link to Ryan Holiday)

When you find a passion or dream or stumble upon a calling, you make an internal decision to pursue it with all you’ve got, for as long as it takes.

When you are so fed up with something, your current job, or the way you’ve been living, that you make a pact with yourself to change no matter what it takes.

Commitment is a verb. It starts with a declaration, but because sometimes real with daily action.

Commitments take belief. Believing in yourself, believing that change or a dream is possible is essential to making it happen. Belief is the prerequisite. Without it, there’s no chance, because the minute things get hard, or you fall off the tracks, you derail yourself and give up.

But through belief, anything is possible with the commitment and consistent action to make it possible.

STAY BOLD, Keep Pursuing,
— Josh Waggoner | Daily Blog #1093

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Repotting

“Plant and your spouse plants with you; weed and you weed alone.” — Jean-Jacques Rousseau

“My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.” — Mitch Hedberg

I was never really a plant guy until I met Gabriella (now my fiancée). I thought indoor plants were pleasing, but I doubt even one thought crossed my mind about buying a plant for myself. That’s one of the subtle ways having a significant other can change you. You start picking up some of their interests and tastes, and vice versa. That’s why when you look at a couple who have been together for a long time look and wear almost identical clothing.

We pick up the habits, idiosyncrasies, style, speech, likes, and dislikes and characters of the people around us. This happens whether or not we are trying too.

If your older brother likes Led Zeppelin, you’ll (eventually) like Led Zeppelin too.

If your friends like to drink often, if you want to hang out with them, you’ll likely drink often too.

If your parents have anger problems, you’ll likely have problems too.

These aren’t 100% definitive statements. Just because you’re significant other likes Metal bands doesn’t *always* mean you will. We all have our own things that are uniquely ours. But when you are surrounded by something, the natural inclination is to be pulled by that something. Good or bad. Parents that worry about everything is a gravitational force that pulls on your own perspectives. Just as parents that are smart with money will subtly change how you handle your own money.

There will be times in your life when you find yourself in situations or habits and mannerisms you don’t like about yourself. For example, maybe you want to eat more healthy foods and exercise more frequently, but you’ve got in the bad habit of eating whatever garbage you have laying around the house or the bad habit of getting off work and vegging out in front of the TV until 1 AM.

When you find yourself in circumstances or bad habits you don’t like, it’s time to repot yourself.

Repot? No, I don’t mean buy more weed. (Hey-o!)

I mean repot like you do for plants.

There comes a time in a plant’s life where they’ve grown too big for their pot. Their root system becomes crowded and can start to degrade and eventually die because it doesn’t have the room to get to the nutrients it needs. Sometimes plants need to be repotted because their in the wrong pot too. Poor or old soil is another reason why a plant may need to be repotted, which can also lead to damaging the plant. (Welcome to my new plant-based blog, where I only write blog posts about plants.) So you need to dig up the plant, break up its root ball to give it more breathing room to grow, and plant it in a new, slightly larger pot.

We need the same thing.

If you keep doing the same thing over and over again, you’re gonna eventually get stuck.

There will be times you get in a rut or when your habits—which started out helpful—are now actually harmful and holding you back. It’s good to break the routine every so often and try new things. 

No, I’m not telling you to dye your hair pink, move across the country, or break up with your friends. (Do that if you want, but don’t say you got the idea from me!) Rather, I suggesting to try something you normally don’t do or even actively dislike doing.

Break things up. If you dislike reading (or think you are bad at it) then try reading every day for a week. If all you do is read, try having a conversation with friends over the phone. Try talking to one new person on social media a week. If all you do is lay around and watch YouTube or TicTok, try banning the apps for a week. You can also go back to them next week if you must. Disrupt your routine. Repot yourself. 

STAY BOLD, Keep Pursuing,
— Josh Waggoner | Daily Blog #914

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How to Change

“Don’t be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

You’ve probably heard the phrase “you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with” a million times. It’s true, spend any amount of time with new co-workers, groups, or friends and you’ll start picking up their mannerisms, perspectives and habits (for better or worse).

Change can come from anywhere. It can greet you from a stranger on the street, it can hit you like a brick from the turn of a page. But change doesn’t have to be something that happens to you — a chance encounter, a brush with failure. Change can start with you. All you have to do is want it enough (or get fed up enough) to go do it.

Action is what leads to change.

Desire and belief in yourself are massively important to making your move effective and making change stick, but without action, nothing happens.

What kind of person do you want to be, the kind that does what he/she says, or only wishes she/he would?

STAY BOLD, Keep Pursuing,
— Josh Waggoner | Daily Blog #797

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Change at Any Moment

“When we are no longer able to change a situation – we are challenged to change ourselves.”

Viktor E. Frankl

“Change your opinions, keep to your principles; change your leaves, keep intact your roots.”

Victor Hugo

Transformations occur all the time, everywhere. We can change in an instant, and also gradually. Usually, we’re experiencing both.

The question is: does transformation ever stop?

Where does a hurricane start? When we can see it from a satellite swirling below? Or when cold air molecules get blasted with warm evaporated water molecules?

What is money? is it a mule and three bushels of grain? Is it a Roman aureus coin? Is it SUPREME clothing? is it a collective human idea? is it 1’s and 0’s on a computer somewhere?

Who are we? Our likes? dislikes? Our personality? Our soul? Our job?

Things are continuously moving. We live in continuous cycles and forces, which mostly we aren’t aware of. History rhymes, as they say. For all we know, we’re experience things right now that have already happened in the past. Or maybe everything right now is completely new.

What ultimately matters is what are we doing to do? How do you want to change? If everything is constantly changing, so can we.

If you could change something about yourself (or your life) instant, what would you change? Do it. Why not? Maybe you don’t like where you are. It’s okay. I’ve been there many times too. The ending is just the beginning. Accept where you are, find a way forward. Change starts with you.

If you could change something gradually over the next year, what would it be?

Do that too. Use time as your ally. Spend five minutes a day on it. Go up to twenty minutes if you can make room for it. There’s no sense in waiting for change to come — it’s already here.

STAY BOLD, Keep Pursuing,
— Josh Waggoner | Daily Blog #789

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Don’t Bet on a Maybe

“Truth is confirmed by inspection and delay; falsehood by haste and uncertainty.”

Tacitus

The biggest regrets I have were when I didn’t go with my gut (or didn’t take the time to even listen to my gut) and instead backed an answer on a ‘maybe’. Here’s another way of putting it, I let other people’s opinions and desires outweigh my own. I backed their truth instead of trusting my own truth.

Perhaps you can related to this as well, because you’ve dealt with it outcome the hard way too.

There are so many important decisions we face in life:

  • Should I take this job? …. hmm I’m not sure, the pay is good…
  • Should I go to this school or that school? (should I go to school at all??) … I want to go to this one, but everyone else is telling me to go to that one…
  • Hey bro, do you want to invest in X Y Z? … it sounds like a great idea, but it’s not really what I’m passionate about…
  • Is this the person I want to be with for the rest of my life?
  • Is this the person I want to be for the rest of my life?

When it comes to making decisions, big or small, never bet your future on a maybe.

There’s a massive difference between “I don’t know” and “I’m not sure”.

“I don’t know” is a perfectly acceptable answer. It shows that there’s still some more time you need to carve out for yourself to think about the question you are answering.

But If you are not sure, then you are hesitating. Hesitation is another form of ‘maybe’.

Hesitation usually is a sign that you are sure, you know you should say yes (or you know you should say no) but for whatever reason, we over think it and confuse ourselves into making the wrong call.

The problem is, t’s easy for a ‘maybe’ to default into a ‘yes’. But I think it should be the other way around.

I think any type of hesitation or uncertainty around a decision should default to a ‘no’. Particularly if your gut is say ‘no’ and your head is saying ‘yes’.

If someone asks you to make a moment’s notice decision and you are not sure, then just say no. Maybe it’s a bad call. Maybe you’ll miss out on an opportunity. But a possible opportunity you are uncertain about is never worth give your valuable resources to (your time and energy). As they say, opportunities are a dime a dozen. If you miss out on one, another will come soon enough. Hell, we can even create our own opportunity instead!

Life is uncertain, don’t let your decisions be uncertain too.

STAY BOLD, Keep Pursuing,
— Josh Waggoner | Daily Blog #690

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Life Principle #11: Define Your Values (Throw A Party)

Do you ever look at a homeless person and wonder what happened to end up where they are?

One time, when I️ was selling my boldsheep clothing at a Sunday market, my Gabriella and I️ somehow came to the conclusion I­t­ would be funny if she sat on the floor in front of my pop-up shop holding a cardboard box with the words ‘will sell shirts for $’ written in big bold lettering.

What happened blew me away!

No one would look at her.

Not even a glance. They couldn’t even take the time to read the sign to see I­t­ was a joke. Someone even called the market cops in! 

We quickly explained the story.

I️ wonder if the reason we ignore homeless people is that deep down, we know that in a bad turn of choices and circumstances that could be us. (Either that or its because they always ask for drinking… er… I️ mean food money)

In the last couple years, I️ experienced a very stress-filled financial meltdown.  Things weren’t working at work and essential I️ wasn’t making enough to live, WHILE I️ was going through some health setbacks. All that to say, my brush against finance chaos made me realize how important your values are, your support group (the people you are closest too), your mindset (what you think, and how you talk to yourself) and your willingness to let go and ask for help is. Without those four things, there’s not much that separates you from a nice home and good food, to no home and going to bed hungry.

This is an extreme example, yet true.
However, finding yourself on the street might not even be the worst way to live. You could argue that going your entire life without knowing hardly anything about who you are and what you love is worse. I️ think I️ can speak for all of us when I️ say, being on your deathbed with regret, looking back at an aimless life in which you flutter from one thing to the next, with no rhyme or reason might be worse than death itself.

This is why defining your values is vitally important.

Life Principle #11 Define Your Values

Defining your values is identifying what you stand for and then standing for them.

What do you want in life?
What matters more than anything to you?
What makes you feel ALIVE?

Now take a good look at the life you are living today. The closer aligned your values of who you want to be and the way you live each day are direct cause and effect. Or in other words,

Show me your values and I’ll show you how far you will get in life.

The problem is, no one each us this shtuff. And if they try it’s so boring we never actually sit down and ask ourselves the most important question: Who do I️ want to be?

But not here, I️ like to keep us on our toes here at the Renaissance Life.
So you know what that means…

It’s time to party. 🥂

Next time you have a chunk of time off, say when you get off work, or this weekend throw a party. Block off some time, put i­t­ on your calendar and make I­t­ mandatory. Who should you invite? You, yourself and you of course! (Buzzkill?) Seriously. It’s time to have a knockdown, drag-out, uncomfortable talk with yourself about who you are, and who you want to be.

Sit down with a pen and some paper. Have a list of questions you want to ask yourself. (Including the three above). Turn off your phone, Block all notifications and social media. Clean your house beforehand so you’re not distracted by your environment. Do whatever you gotta do to be alone for your party.

It’s going to be challenging, I­t­ might even be awkward, but it’s going to be worth i­t­ because defining your values is the most important thing you can do.

How many of us go through the motions in life, aimless, and hoping something good would happen. I️ say, let’s make I­t­ happen!

Imagine as if you were having dinner with your current self, your childhood self, and your future selves. Every action and choice you make today can determine your future self, so there might be a few of future you’s at this party.

Start with where you are:

What lights you up?
If you could learning anything instantly what would I­t­ be?
Where do you dream about living?
What do you really think of your current job/school life?
What kind of people do you love to be around?
What did you love to do as a kid?
How do you think about yourself? 
Do you defeat yourself with your mind before you even begin?
How much time do you let yourself have fun on any given week?
What are your current inputs? (TV, books, people, food etc)

And then ask yourself questions about who you would like to be:

What does my ideal job? What sounds like the greatest job to you?
What would make me happier? 
What life would make my childhood self proud?
What is missing?
Am I️ letting fear win over courage?
What do I️ want to master?
Who do I️ want to know and be friends with?
What kind of life would make my future self happy on his/her death bed?
What are my strengths and how can I️ make them daily habits?
What are my weaknesses and how can I️ turn them into opportunities?
What would I­t­ look like if I­t­ was easy (This ones’ from Tim Ferriss)

The person you want to be is closer than you think. All I­t­ takes is a decision, this day, about who you want to be. I️ believe we are capable of change, and that change begins the moment we decide that we want I­t­.

Your values will change as you grow, they will ebb and flow depending on where you are in life. But your core foundations will always stay the same.
For me, life principles are my defining values. Be a Lifelong Learner, Act Boldly, Live Boldly, Be Your Own Renaissance. These are the values I️ have and the life principles I️ aim for. I️ don’t always hit the bullseye, but I’m always aiming my arrow in that direction.

Knowing who you want to be makes failure and bombing easier. Failures change from cataclysmic my-life-is-over moments into stepping stones to opportunities.

Today is the day to choose to be different.
See the change, take the leap.
Whoever you think you are, you are correct.

Stay BOLD, Keep Pursuing,

— Josh Waggoner

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Related Insights

“Here are the values that I stand for: honesty, equality, kindness, compassion, treating people the way you want to be treated and helping those in need. To me, those are traditional values.” — Ellen DeGeneres

“I have learned that as long as I hold fast to my beliefs and values – and follow my own moral compass – then the only expectations I need to live up to are my own.” — Michelle Obama

“Your beliefs become your thoughts, 
Your thoughts become your words, 
Your words become your actions, 
Your actions become your habits, 
Your habits become your values, 
Your values become your destiny.” 
― Mahatma Gandhi

“If you don’t stick to your values when they’re being tested, they’re not values: they’re hobbies.” —  Jon Stewart

“Find people who share your values, and you’ll conquer the world together.” 
― John Ratzenberger

Life Principle #7: Be Your Own Renaissance 

For half of my life, I felt I was living asleep.
I don’t think I was apathetic, at least not completely. I cared about things and loved my life.
But I wasn’t 100% awake. I was sleep living (or awake dreaming). I was letting life happen at me, rather than with me.

The moment I decided to take learning, and pursuing things I love into my own hands, the doors of my mind blew off and I saw what is possible in this life. We are capable of creating our own change.

It was the beginning of my Renaissance journey, and it all started with a decision to become healthy.

I did everything wrong of course. I cooked with the wrong oils. I didn’t eat enough, and probably unintentionally malnourished myself. Basically, I had no idea what I was doing lol. But it doesn’t matter.

What matters is I decided to create myself that day. I took one step towards creating a better life that I dreamed of.

When it comes to decisions, I like to look at life through a binary lens:
Own your life, or let life own you.

Own your life, or let life own you.

Life Principle #7: Be Your Own Renaissance.

When you desire change, no one is going to do it for you. As much as I dreamed of wishing for a fairy godmother to put a briefcase full of money under my bed while I was sleeping, it wasn’t going to come true.

And when we don’t get handed the silver plater we hoped for and we feel disappointed, whose fault it that?

Our own.

Be Your Own Renaissance

If you want to change something about your life, you’ve got to be the one to do it. You are your own renaissance, you make your own change.

Don’t blame the world for your problems, and don’t blame yourself either! Focus forward and change it.

Becoming Your Own Renaissance means taking charge of your fundamental liberties.

It means honing your character to be more positive, capable, resilient, and impactful person.

It means deciding who you spend your time with, and what you spend your time doing.

It means believing that you can be happy and can immediately start creating more happiness in your life.

It means training your mind to develop ideas, solve problems and create financial freedom in your life.

It means being open to experiences, possibilities and new ways of thinking.

It means you can decide your beliefs and values of who you want to be, despite what everyone else tells you.

You have the power to take your life circumstance into your own hands. 

Let me bring out my jazz bongos here for a second and spit some rhymes at you.

Life is perspective. The world feels like it revolves around us because we see through our own eyes, and feel with our own bodies. Happiness, pleasure pain — we can see someone in pain, but until we are in pain ourselves, we won’t truly know how it feels. And the way we see our world determines how we act in it. When you see things as being unchangeable, you live your life through that perspective. You identify with the circumstances. I can’t get fit because I am fat. I can’t start a business, I don’t know enough yet. I can’t learn guitar, I’m too old.

But when you open up your mind to the possibility that you actually get to decide how your life turns out (no matter how old or young you are) all you see is abundance.

I want to be fit, let me figure out how. I want to start a business, okay let me create a website and figure it out. I want to learn guitar, I’ll take lessons. And when things don’t work out, you keep going until you learn how.

I’ll put my jazz bongos away now {:P

Be your own Renaissance, Make your own change.

Stay BOLD, Keep Pursuing,

— Josh Waggoner

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Related Insights

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” — George Bernard Shaw

“The biggest adventure you can take is to live the life of your dreams.” — Oprah Winfrey

“The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge.” — Bertrand Russell

Principle #2: Small, Consistent Actions Lead to Big Change

Everything you want to be in life starts with what you do today, this day.

Today is a powerful change maker in our life story. What you do each today can make or break you, because a little time NOW compounds later. (Just like investing $)

Think about it: 

If you eat a tub of Ice Cream Today, you’re not going to get fat. Eating bad one day won’t kill you.
BUT (< big but there :), eating bad today, and the next day and the next WILL add up over time and take its toll on your health (and neck rolls).

The same thing works in the positive direction — losing weight, gaining muscle (got swol?)

Authors don’t write a book in a day.
Entrepreneurs don’t create a successful runaway business overnight.
Musicians don’t become famous after one show.

But doing something — anything — every day? That’s going to add up to something extraordinary.

Why do we live (on average) to the ripe old age of 90 or beyond?

Life doesn’t happen at once either. (I came, I saw, I stood in lines, I died)

Life is iterative, which is why each iteration — each day — is vitally important.

By focusing on what you do, the next action/moment, and aligning that action to your priorities, you turn yourself into a powerful force of massive change.

The results you seek in life might not show up tomorrow, but by doing the work today, you’ve planted the seeds of its reality.

Renaissance Life Principle #2:

Small, Consistent Actions Lead to Big Change.

When we focus too much on the future or dwell too much on our past, we lose the ability to create change. 

Living for today is about being aware of what is important to you, prioritizing those over filler or shiny objects, and pursuing them consistently.

Most people see time as a disadvantage or enemy:

“How did time fly so quickly?”
“I never have enough time…”
“There’s not enough time in the day…”

(I’m guilty of these and more.)

When you decide to pursue a Renaissance Life, time can become your ally. By working on your goals each day, even just a little bit (even so small it feels like you didn’t make any progress) and developing the patience to Keep Pursuing, your goals are basically inevitable. 

Look, I know what some of you might be thinking, we can’t all walk on the moon, or be knighted by the Queen, (Sir Waggoner at your service), but we can create massive impact in our lives and in the lives of others by focusing on the little baby steps. Small actions create waves.

But what if today sucked? What if I miss a day (or week)? What if I failed miserably? What do I do then?

Look Forward. 

Failure, missteps, setbacks — they are part of the learning process. Look forward to the person you strive to be, take action immediately on your dreams, and you WILL be that person right now. Focus on the now, each second we are still breathing is a chance for us to make a change. Your fresh start comes the moment you decide to take create the change you wish to see. Take Small actions today!

Stay BOLD, Keep Pursuing,

— Josh Waggoner
 

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Looking for the perfect life in Barnes & Nobles

Gabriella and I did something fun tonight.

… No not that, get your mind out of the gutter.

We went rollerskating!

The Skate Place was my jam back in the middle school days.

Tricks. Pizza basically made out of cardboard. Trucking and Jamming.
Aka living the dream.

I bought a pair of skates for Gabriella for Christmas 🎄 so we went to go try them out.

The place hadn’t changed an ounce. The only thing that has changed was me. I had grown wiser yet also more anxious about my world. (Also taller, I’ve gained a few inches since middle school. I was definitely the tallest person there and I’m only 6 ft)

Before we went, we grabbed some dinner and hopped into Barnes and Nobles for a bit.

We always have fun in booklandia. (Well… aren’t you the life of the party Josh)

I wanted to find a book that will change my life, help me simplify and handle overwhelm better.

I asked Gabriella to help me find some and as we were looking she wisely said,

“If you’re looking for the perfect life in Barnes & Nobles, you’re in the wrong place”.

She’s right of course.

If you’re looking for the perfect life in Barnes & Nobles, you’re in the wrong place.

Books are windows into mastery and wisdom.

Books can give you the insights and answers you seek. But there comes a time where books aren’t going to work for you. To change your life you must do the work. You must make the hard decisions and take action towards the life you dream of. Same goes for talking, daydreaming, complaining, wishing — eventually you must decide whether you are just going to talk the talk for the rest of your life or also walk the walk.

The difference between those who have and those who don’t is consistent, persistent actions towards the life they want. Dreams don’t fall from a book, or plow into you as you go around the skating rink; Dreams happen through Bold actions.

Stay BOLD, Keep Pursuing,

— Josh Waggoner

Related Insights

“When you have a dream, you’ve got to grab it and never let go.” — Carol Burnett

“Change your thoughts and you change your world.” — Norman Vincent Peale

“If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.” — Maya Angelou