Doing the Unexpected

“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.”

Anaïs Nin

One of the big regrets of the dying you hear about is working too much. This makes sense to me. If I spend 99.9% of my time working, (hopefully) building wealth but ignore or don’t give time to the people I love, then what was the point of working for? 

The other big regret that I forget about, or perhaps I avoid because it’s uncomfortable, is conforming:

“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”

The courage to live true to myself.

How often in life do we do the exact opposite of this?

It takes courage to do the unexpected. Not only do you have to face your own fears, but you also have to face the fears of the people around you, who are usually trying to keep you safe. But safety is rarely assured in life. Sometimes, playing it safe is the riskiest thing we can do. But stepping out on a limb and becoming your own person is also potentially risky.

Sometimes, playing it safe is the riskiest thing we can do.

There’s always a chance that doing something risky will blow up in your face. The balance between how much we play it safe, and how much we take chances is unique to each of us, but the big thing we want to avoid is complacency. 

Complacency is playing it safe because you are scared and you don’t believe that you can do it (whatever it is). It’s wanting things to stay the same out of fear of everything going downhill if things change. ‘Stick to the status quo.’

The problem is, the status quo is a lie. The status quo is just the status quo that you know and are surrounded by.

Ultimately, we have to decide what kind of life we want to live and go do it. Otherwise, someone else (who might not have our best interests in mind) will decide for us. Otherwise, we keep making the same old mistakes, falling for the same old traps and patterns.

STAY BOLD, Keep Pursuing,
— Josh Waggoner | Daily Blog #785

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See Change as Good — Life Principle #20

You don’t realize how quickly time moves until its already passed. 

When I was in high school (and middle school) I had a really tight-knit group of friends. We were into making music, movies, jokes, making funny short videos, and being your typical, well-rounded goofballs.

I’ll never forget a video that one of the guys (Jonathan) stitched together from us jamming out and having a helluva good time. He set it to the song, I’ve Got Friends by the Manchester Orchestra. It’s like he intuitively knew our time in high school as a group was about to close, and we would be moving on to college and would never see each other as much as we did, every day, waking up at 6 am and hanging out at and around school.

I don’t remember the details, but I do remember the feeling it gave me, (and gives me every time I play that song)

I miss those moments we had and think about fondly on them.

Life Principle #20: See Change As Good

If you’re not changing, you’re not growing, and if you’re not growing your stuck in place.

Happiness and meaning are fluid — they happen on the journey, not the destination (put that on a poster and smoke it).

Change is good. Its the conduit that takes us from sad times to happy times (and sometimes vice versa). Change can lead to unknown adventures and wild places. It’s hard we were stepping away from something or people we love to follow a calling or jump into a new way of living, but you always have those collective memories. I always have those times with my friends goofing off in my room at my parent’s house (I’m tearing up thinking about it). No one can take that from you. (Another reason why health is vitally important too. A healthy mind is a more capable collector of memories)

I think we fear change for the same reason that we can love change: Because it breaks our status quo and leads to unknown, potentially exciting places.

The best part about change is we can make it. We have the power to change our minds, opinions, the direction in your life and more at ANY MOMENT. Usually, it takes a failure or painful experience to see that, but the power to change is always within our reach. Even small actions can lead to big change eventually.

Often times, you’ll face situations or setbacks you don’t want to be in. This is where change is not only good but can become your best friend. When you’re feeling stuck or have hit rock bottom, burnt yourself, or pulling your hair out because you’re at your wit’s end, it’s time to make some change. 

Change starts with you. Be the change you want to see in your life and in the world. Break the status quo.
And when change happens, be good with the new possibilities.

Stay BOLD, Keep Pursuing,

— Josh Waggoner

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Related Insights

“Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.” — George Bernard Shaw

“The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.” — William Arthur Ward

“There is nothing permanent except change.” — Heraclitus

 

I Wont Stop

When something goes wrong, I️ tend to default to being discouraged. If someone reprimands me or tells me I️ can’t do something (you can’t accomplish x, you’ll never be able to do Y), its easy to fall for their point of view or, at the very least, let I­t­ effect my mental performance. But this is not a successful mindset.

Complaints, criticism, disbelief, or hate towards you is inevitable when you’re doing something out of the status quo. (Something the hater wishes they would do themselves) 

The status quo is the collective agreement of the way things are, from the people and culture that surrounds you. The funny thing about status quo’s is that they are different depending on who you surround yourself with. What’s normal and expected from your typical college student is wildly different from what’s normal and expected from billionaires changing the world. What’s abnormal for your circle when you break the status quo can be natural to another groups point of view. Reading, for example. If you are surrounded by people who hate reading or saying something like ‘what’s the point of reading when you have a TV?’, you’re going to be shamed into the same mindset. And if you start reading they’re going to give you hell for I­t­. But on the opposite spectrum, point out to me any billionaire who doesn’t have a massive library and are constantly soaking up knowledge.

Once you realize that status quo’s are not all created equal, you can begin to take BOLD actions and create massive improvements in your life.

Instead of being discouraged, a successful mindset takes what the person says and turns I­t­ into fuel. Coal to the fire. It’s an “I won’t stop” or “I’ll prove you wrong” mentality. Although you’re not doing I­t­ for them — you’re doing I­t­ for you. I️ won’t stop — no matter how hard or scary I­t­ gets — because I️ know that I️ am capable of achieving my goals with enough time, effort, and intent.

By thinking this way, not even pain can stop you.
By adopting the mindset of the type of person you want to become, your dreams are inevitable.

Stay BOLD, Keep Pursuing

— Josh Waggoner

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Related Insights

“I like criticism. It makes you strong.” —  LeBron James

“In criticism I will be bold, and as sternly, absolutely just with friend and foe. From this purpose nothing shall turn me.” — Edgar Allan Poe

To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.” — Elbert Hubbard