“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” Walter Winchell
Seneca once said, “One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship is to understand and to be understood.”
Who we are comes from a multitude of variables. Your upbringing, past, mistakes, likes, dislikes, desires, dreams and goals, actions, friends, etc.
Everyone wants to feel like they belong and they are heard.
Friends are a massive influencer. From how we talk, to what we are interested in, friends help shape and define who we are.
A true friend first desires to get to know you. They want to know you. They also want to be known. They might not completely know you (sometimes we barely know ourselves ). But they also see you from an outside perspective, and therefore potentially know you in ways you don’t.
Next, a true friend accepts who you are… to a point. I give the caveat because acceptance is also influence. If you are a bad influence, then people not persuaded by your charms will bounce off you quickly. Otherwise, acceptance and forgiveness is built into the DNA of friendship. We all make mistakes and do stupid things from time to time. A true friend looks last the failures and see’s the true character and intent.
A true friend also wants to see you succeed. They might feel envious or challenged by your success, but they are also genuine happy for you. They know that success often rubs shoulders with people close by and influences by proxy.
And a true friend wants to spend time with you. We could be doing something—like watching a movie or playing DnD. Or we could be doing nothing at all—just being.
Finding these types of relationships can be tough, especially as we get older. We get busy and more reluctant to try new things. But one of the best ways to cultivate true friends is to be one yourself and lead by action.
STAY BOLD, Keep Pursuing — Josh Waggoner | Daily Blog #1417 (draft 2)