It’s really to take advice. Even when you ask for it. Advice shows us our flaws and weaknesses.
It’s worse when it comes from someone close to us. Because, if anyone knows our flaws, it’s them. Even knowing the advice is solid is still difficult to swallow.
But advice not taken is useless—only noise. Not that all advice should be taken. It’s helpful to know where the advice is coming from. What’s the motivation behind it? Is it coming from a genuine place? Jealousy? Fear? Protection? Love?
Also, what’s the weight of the advice? Have they lived it? Do their actions align with their words? Are they an example of the advice they are giving? It’s impossible to give advice about something if you don’t follow it yourself (or haven’t followed it in the past).
And we all know it’s easier to give than receive. Part of that’s because we have an outside perspective and are less emotionally invested compared to the person on the receiving end of the advice.
It’s similar to telling someone what they can and can’t do.
There’s a lot of people who are motivated when you tell them they can’t do something. My dad is like that. If someone tells him he can’t do something, he has an overwhelming desire to prove them wrong.
But I don’t think I have that trait. I don’t wilt or give up when someone tells me I can’t do something, but it does make me feel isolated and a little blue for a while.
There’s a lot of people who feel motivated by someone telling them they can do something.
But I’m not a fan of this either. Encouragement is fantastic, but motivation should come from inside you, not through external validation. (Of course, if someone I admire told me they believed in my abilities, I’m sure I would float from pure happiness.)
Passion and ambition come from the heart. The bigger your dream, the harder it will be. Externally motivated by fame, recognition, money and the like won’t make you happy AND successful.
What drives you?
What are the things only you can do?
Where do you want to make a dent?
What fuels you?
STAY BOLD, Keep Pursuing,
— Josh Waggoner | Daily Blog #1170