The Opportunity to Change

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Have you noticed that there’s always this tension inside us between who we are, who we were, and who we want to be?

Each day, our choices define us. Some days are certainly better than others. 

Yesterday, I had all these ambitions about what I wanted to accomplish after work, but in the end, I mostly found myself feeling bored and spent the evening not doing much.

Some days it’s easy to look at yourself—your problems, your personality, your looks, your circumstances, your surroundings—and dislike what you see. But I don’t think dis-liking ourselves is inherently a bad thing. The key is to not blame yourself—as in who you are—rather, look to what you are doing that is causing you outcomes you don’t want. By noticing something we dislike, we become aware of a part of ourselves that we want to change. Dislike is only detrimental when it turns to hate. When dwell on something we can’t change, or wish we would change but fear to do it, our self-distaste becomes self-loathing. It’s difficult to do or change anything when you hate yourself.

Why was I feeling bored and undisciplined? Because I ate an unhealthy meal and spent too much time watching shows on my phone. I’m wasn’t the problem. The problem was what I was doing. Giving into easy—avoiding the things I really wanted to do instead.

It’s okay to be flawed. We are all flawed in some form or fashion.

For me, it’s taking on too many things at once. I know that I do it, I know when I’m about to do it and becoming aware of our challenging behaviors is how we can begin to turn them into something positive. The practice I’ve taken on is saying yes to things that matter to me and saying no to things that don’t. This is my practice. This is how I can get better.

Flaws show that we are human. Nobody likes a perfect busybody with great hair and style. In some ways, flaws are interesting personality quirks. Perhaps your constant tardiness is endearing and makes others smile. Maybe your ability to continuously get parking tickets is part of what makes you YOU.

—To a point, of course. There comes a point where a bad habit or a flaw becomes something that’s holding you back. When you want something to change—when you feel like something needs to *give*—then it’s time to make a plan and let change happen.

Things will change—and change gives us the opportunity to make things better.

Better for ourselves, sure. But also better for everyone we come into contact with.

STAY BOLD, Keep Pursuing,
— Josh Waggoner | Daily Blog #946

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