Goodbye 2019

“You must live life in its very elementary forms. The Mexicans have a very nice word for it: pura vida. It doesn’t mean just purity of life, but the raw, stark-naked quality of life. And that’s what makes young people more into a filmmaker than academia.”

Werner Herzog

2019 was a particular raw year for me. I faced quite a few harsh realities that had been accumulating like cobwebs in an unattended ceiling corner. It seems insane to me how momentary decisions, like being in the wrong place at the wrong time, or hanging out with the wrong people has big-boy ( / big-girl) ramifications and unintended consequences. For me, it was staying too long at a job that’s wasn’t working for me. I had my reasons, but at the end of it, my ‘reasons’ were more justifications for things I didn’t like that I was seeing (and trying to avoid), such as colleagues exaggerating successes and thoughtlessness (or manipulation). Apologies, I’m being vague here. I’m not some who enjoy mincing words or criticizing another’s character.

Negativity and anger harm the source more than the recipient.

At the end of the day, my character is the only thing I have control over, not someone else’s. We can set the example, lead by doing, instruct and guide when given the opportunity, but we act for others, they have to do it themselves.

In many ways, I’m ending my 2019 in a much better place than how it started. But I can’t help but feel like I’m entering the 2020 atmosphere hot upon reentry and a little raw. Perhaps that’s exactly what I need. A raw look at things will give me an honest and first principled look at my life and creativity (music, writing, art, business). Who knows? Maybe this raw, anxious energy can give me a creative edge. Great ideas tend to bleed. And honesty and heart show through and hit a nerve that connects your ideas to real people who want to hear them and be a part of the story too.

Great ideas tend to bleed.

I’m still thinking about what I want to experience and do in 2020. I don’t think I’m going to do a million resolutions like I normally do. I want to have some sort of structure, goals to aim for, but I want to do so thoughtfully and intentionally.

  • How can I help friends and family accomplish their goals this new year?
  • What if I focused on enabling others, instead of solely focused on myself?
  • What’s working, what’s not working?
  • How can I nurture my intuition more and follow it at the moment?
  • What can I remove from my life? What is distracting me from what I love and enjoy?
  • How can I focus on experience, without sacrificing the future?
  • What can I build this new year that will set me up five, ten years from now?

STAY BOLD, Keep Pursuing,
— Josh Waggoner | Daily Blog #793

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