Like almost everything else, being social is a skill.
I’m what you call an ambivert — part extrovert, part introvert. I️ love being around people, especially people who have great energy leave me feeling jazzed after talking to them. But I️ also need alone time. If I️ don’t have some time for solitude to be able to think, read, write, and all-around tinker and create I️ go CRAZY.
And it’s easy to fall into neglecting spending time with friends and being social when you are introverted and get your energy from spending alone time for yourself.
If willpower is a finite resource, so is personality traits like introversion and extroversion. There is only so long an introvert can be surrounded by people, and an extrovert can be alone without going mad. Introverts need space. Extroverts need people.
If you live in a city. When your always surround by people, you crave “me myself and I️” time. And when you are constantly bumping into people on the street, and surrounded by people at restaurants, and work, your social meter fills up. You spend all this precious time with people without actually spending It with people you care about. The key is to know how you refuel.
Even so, life is a balance of both time with yourself — and being okay with solitude — and time with others — loving, being loved — which allows you to take the full advantage and purpose behind each.
Being comfortable with just a book and your thoughts takes skill. Being comfortable telling stories in a crowd of friends or strangers, or starting up a conversation at a social event takes skill too.
One situation is easier for introverts, and the other for extroverts, but they both require practice and intentions to be exceptional at them. Both take a level of uncomfortableness to get going, but once you do they reap fantastic benefits.
My challenge to you and myself is to start cultivating at least one hobby/skill that involves a group setting if you’re an introvert, and at least one hobby/skill that involves being by yourself if you’re an extrovert.
Stay BOLD, Keep Pursuing,
And wherever you are, keep smiling 🙂
— Josh Waggoner
“People inspire you, or they drain you — pick them wisely.” — Hans F. Hansen
“Know yourself to improve yourself.” — Auguste Comte
“I’m a little unusual: I’m a six-person-or-less extrovert.” — Reid Hoffman